Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize