I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
