Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Randomize
