my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
