it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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