I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
