So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
