i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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