I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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