If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
