Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
