Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
