Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
