haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
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i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
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If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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