I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize