DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
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Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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