dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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