oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
