splinters make it hard to masturbate
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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