Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
