did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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