My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
