I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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