If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize