I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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