That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
So much Jack, so little girl.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
