What a fucking waste of an outfit
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
