She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.