Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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