The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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