I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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