4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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