Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
