my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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