never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize