Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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