Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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