Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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