You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
