In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize