New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
