When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
