I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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