i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
