It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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