im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
