Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
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