i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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