dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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