i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
