The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
