If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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