So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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